Day 1 of Unemployment (17:59 it's Guinness Time)

Woke up today exhilarated and with a new lease of life. What's more interesting than having nothing to do with your day - unlimited opportunities await!

I made some beans and sausages for lunch. Yum. Felt this was a pretty good, economical meal that any unemployed person would eat (that's one destitute point to me). Packed with fibre and one of your five-a-day... beans (will have to check that up later).

I sat at the table, fork to mouth in thought about what I could possibly achieve in all my new found spare time.

Task 1: Guinness World Records

Always wanted to be in the Guinness World Records and had a fantastic idea the other morning so I decided to check out how easy it is to submit a suggestion for a new record on the GWR website. Turns out it's ridiculously easy that such a simpleton like myself can even contribute a new "ground breaking" idea for a world record. My concept was basically this:

See how many hours I can repeatedly hit snooze on my alarm clock for without going crazy or developing tinnitus.

I was elated to find that, although someone had already decided that seeing "How many alarm clocks I can smash with my feet in one minute" was a good idea, no one had yet to suggest such a ground breaking feat as the one that had just sprung to me that previous morning. What ensues is my response to the application question: what record (current or potentially new) are you interested in?

"New Record: Longest period of 'snooze' pressing on an alarm clock.

Everyone knows how annoying the snooze feature is on an alarm clock! It wakes most people up in the world every morning! I want to attempt to do something fun involving the snooze alarm. I want to set the record for the person who is able to sit through repeated snooze alarms the longest, which as far as I can gather is an innovative new record.

The record is simple to measure. The stopwatch begins when an alarm sets off at approximately 0800 in the morning. The usual time I get up. Please note, this time may vary for other competitors and may depend on their time zones.

As all alarms are different and therefore snooze times may vary, I propose a standardised snooze period of 5minutes between each alarm chime to ensure maximum frustration for the participant.

The record is to be measured by the longest period of time in hours and minutes the person in bed can remain sleeping and turning off the intermittent alarm from the first time it chimes. Therefore, the record is essentially based on endurance, because everyone knows that alarm clock chimes are annoying and they're designed to get people out of bed (not to stay in one!).

The reason that I want to complete this record is because I've recently became unemployed since finishing University and have began a blog to record significant events in my unemployed days to make sure people know that I'm using my time effectively.
Therefore please diligently consider my application for a truly unique record attempt.

Jon Doe
P.S. From a publication point of view I would be willing to be photographed in my pj's, wearing a night cap, clutching a teddy bear whilst attempting the record."

I thought that they'd especially appreciate those final commitments. From here on in the process is simple. They plan on reviewing my innovative new suggestion for the Guinness Book of Records with the view to getting back in touch in the next 4-6 weeks... I'll keep you updated.