And who elected Bono Supreme Leader?

"Behold your overlord!" cries Bono, as Conservatives looks on bewildered.

Politics took a turn for the worse today when celebrity endorsement reared its ugly head. The Conservative Party Conference was interrupted by the intrusion of the omnipresent and omni-benevolent Bono who arrived bellowing a decree from the Gods.

He spoke of a post-Labour, Conservative party upholding Labour's promises to alleviate world poverty by keeping international aid spending at a target of 0.7% GDP per annum. The Tories lapped up Bono the Benevolent's every word, but secretly scoffed, 'Why would we give to the third world when our own children are due our hard earned cash to the tune of a £2 million inheritance.'

The raising of the inheritance tax threshold to £2million is just one of a number of new policies cited by the Conservatives with the intention of fixing Broken Britain. Of course, despite their best intentions to persuade Britain's richest working class, single mum's to stay with their partners, their policy only benefits rich, married couples, where coaxing people into staying together with financial incentives isn't really an issue of epidemic proportions at all. And as the rich benefit from tax-breaks, the funding of Bono's make poverty history campaign, if to be met, must be gained from substantial cuts in other needy services if the Conservatives are to meet their deficit crunching promise. What Bono make of all this?

William Hague introduced Bono as someone "you don't normally hear from at Conservative conferences". By this I presume he means someone with a sympathy toward social justice.

Unfortunately the limitations of this joke are all to assured. It seems that social justice only interests justice supremo Bono on a worldly level. Bono himself has undoubtedly been linked to tax evasion hypocrisy in the past, depriving his native state the ability to redistribute from the rich to the poor. And with that in mind it's no doubt that Bono shares something in common with the Conservatives - Compassionate Capitalism.